Today, I got trapped. Where? In the bathroom in my apartment. Why? Because the wind blew down my full length mirror which wedged itself between the outward opening bathroom door and the wall. The bathroom has no other ways out other than that door. I was already later than usual in getting ready for work... and while I was taking a shower, I heard a huge thunk. I dried off, tried to open the door and I was like FUCK...
Anyway, after tearing my bathroom apart... which is difficult because, except for my little toiletries, everything's one smooth piece of plastic [the walls, floor and tub are all one piece]... I tore apart a small plastic and metal shelf with legs and put all my weight against the door. I could see the edge of the mirror. I stuck the piece of metal out through the centimeter wide opening, and managed to lift the mirror's edge just enough to allow me to open the door enough to stick my hand through. I was stuck for near 15 minutes... and if the mirror had fallen just a little more to the left, I would have been stuck there for some time. Didn't have my phone. No one comes to visit me. I would've been fucked. *SIGH*
OH, and here's more Engrish from today's lessons.
I came out of my orfice.
[Ah, yes, she meant OFFICE.]
I am a retard.
[I tried soooo many times to get her to remember "I am retired." But alas, she kept saying retard. I hope she doesn't ever say that to a foreigner.]
We can use dog as secretary.
[He meant SECURITY... heh.]